When Turkey Isn’t Enough: JD Vance’s Thanksgiving Ode to Trump

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You know, I thought Thanksgiving was about gratitude, family, and maybe arguing over who overcooked the turkey. But apparently, JD Vance thinks it’s the perfect time to pen a love letter to Donald Trump. Because nothing says “I’m thankful” like a side of political pandering with your mashed potatoes.

I mean, come on! Can’t we have one day without politicians turning a national holiday into their personal campaign trail? It’s Thanksgiving, not “Thanks-Giving-Me-A-Platform-To-Praise-A-Former-President Day.” But there he is, flooding social media with accolades as if Trump personally stuffed his turkey.

It’s almost impressive how he managed to make Thanksgiving about someone entirely unrelated to the holiday. What’s next? An Easter sermon dedicated to his favorite stockbroker? It’s as if subtlety packed its bags and left Washington for good.

And let’s not forget, this is the same JD Vance who once criticized Trump before doing a full 180 when it suited his political ambitions. Ah yes, the ol’ political pirouette. If flip-flopping were an Olympic sport, he’d be a gold medalist.

But here’s the real kicker: while most Americans are worrying about rising grocery prices, making rent, or whether they can afford to turn on the heat this winter, JD thinks we all need a reminder of how great he thinks Trump is. Because that’s what’s really missing from our lives—a hearty helping of political nostalgia.

Is this what we’ve come to? Our leaders using holidays as personal PR events? I half-expected a pie chart in the shape of an actual pie showing us how much more thankful we should be under previous administrations.

Meanwhile, the rest of us are just trying to get through dinner without a family argument erupting over the stuffing. Uncle Bob doesn’t need any more fuel for his rants, thank you very much.

And don’t even get me started on the irony. A day that’s supposed to bring us together, being used to drive us further apart. It’s like bringing a skunk to a garden party—unnecessary and guaranteed to ruin everyone’s good time.

Maybe, just maybe, we could use a break from the constant political grandstanding. Perhaps our elected officials could let us digest our meals in peace without shoving their agendas down our throats like a second helping of Aunt Linda’s mystery casserole.

But no, that would require reading the room, and apparently, the room’s Wi-Fi is down.

So here’s a wild idea: next Thanksgiving, let’s focus on what the day’s actually about. Gratitude. Family. Maybe even helping those less fortunate. And for our politicians? Take the day off from tweeting, posting, and whatever else you do to keep yourselves in the spotlight.

Because trust me, the only stuffing we care about is the one on our plates, not the one in your speechesUntil then, pass the gravy, hold the political commentary, and let’s all be thankful for the mute button.

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