Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
If you thought the feds had enough on their plate, think again. In a move that I’m almost guaranteed to file under “What the Heck Were They Thinking,” the federal government has decided to drop the hammer on New Mexico weed farmers.
Yes, my friends, just as we thought we were skipping merrily along to a future where buying weed could feel as mundane as picking up your dry cleaning, the feds have decided to swoop in with all the subtlety of a hippo in a china shop.
A Moment of High Hopes… Crushed
Here we were, in the land of enchantment, New Mexico, where the local motto might soon be, “Come for the chiles, stay because you got too high.” People were setting up shop, getting into the groove of growing green legally after state legalization. Jobs? Created. Tax revenue? Streaming in. Local economies? Finally catching a bit of a break. But hold your horses—or, in New Mexico, your burritos, because the feds aren’t having any of it.
The Not-So-Subtle Art of Buzz Killing
The irony, folks, is thicker than the smoke at a Snoop Dogg concert. Here are the feds, seizing all the cannabis they can find. Why? Because it turns out, not everyone got the memo on the exacting standards set by Uncle Sam’s army of clipboard holders. Cross a T wrongly or dot an I with a little heart, and bam, you’re in the feds’ naughty list.
And who suffers? Not just the bigwig operations but the little guys, the mom-and-pop farmers who thought, hey, maybe there’s a future here for us that doesn’t involve creating the next hot chili sauce. Now, these folks are staring down the barrel of an economic shutdown fired by none other than—you guessed it—the DEA.
Federally Fun Times in Federal Oversight
Let’s just picture the training day at the DEA for a moment. “Alright, everyone, gather ‘round. We’ve got a hard day of killing small business dreams and maybe, if we’re lucky, set back community progress by about a decade. Sound good? Great, let’s roll out.”
And in swoops the feds, in their pristine badged attire, seizing everything from Billy Joe’s Buds to Susie Q’s Sativas. It’s like Santa Claus turned bad, folks, ‘cept instead of coal he’s handing out subpoenas.
And What’s the Logic Here, Exactly?
So, this federal crackdown is supposedly about regulation, about ensuring everything is above board. But here’s a thought—maybe, just maybe, there’s a way to enforce these so-called standards without completely bulldozing over the livelihoods of locals. If the bar’s set so high that even professional pole vaulters are nervous, maybe, I don’t know, lower it a smidge?
The Punchline That Just Writes Itself
At this point, it’s clear that we’re not just dealing with a failure to communicate; we’re witnessing a masterclass in how to spectacularly miss the point. Economic growth, individual freedoms, progress—these aren’t just buzzwords to throw around during election season. They mean something to real people doing real jobs that, last I checked, were made perfectly legal by state law.
Wrapping It Up in Blunt Terms
New Mexico was on its way to becoming a beacon of progress in how we view and handle our relations with the jolly green giant, cannabis. Instead, we get rerouted to a showcase of absurdity courtesy of our friends at the federal level.
New Mexico, you deserve better. Farmers, keep fighting the good fight. And federal government? Maybe it’s time to take a page out of New Mexico’s book and chill.
Source: ‘Seize all cannabis’: Inside the surprising federal crackdown on New Mexico weed farmers
