Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
The Details
Well, folks, gather around because it’s storytime, and today’s fairy tale takes place in the grand old castle of Mar-a-Lago, where our former knight-in-questionable-armor, Donald Trump, decided that dining with a couple of controversial characters was the kind of news we needed to spice up our incredibly uneventful lives.
Let’s just say that if dinner invitations were LinkedIn endorsements, he’d be vouching for ‘expertise in problematic associations.’ The soirée in question, which now has every talking head on cable news doing their best impression of a scandalized Victorian lady, involved none other than a white nationalist and an infamous rapper who’s recently taken a sabbatical from music to work full-time in the field of controversy.
The Breakdown
- Dinner and a Show of Poor Judgment
- Who needs vetting guests when you can stir the pot at the expense of your already ‘spectacular’ reputation? The guest list was more incendiary than the menu, presumably.
- The Media’s All-You-Can-Tweet Buffet
- In a world starving for sanity, the media found a Las Vegas-style buffet of sensationalism. And like any good buffet, everyone’s overindulging and regretting it later.
- When Keeping it Real Goes Alt-Right
- It’s almost as if someone said, “Let’s play political Russian roulette!” and Trump, with the eager grin of a reality show host about to reveal the season’s twist, said: “Hold my Diet Coke!”
- A+ for Consistency in Controversy
- If there were such a thing as a frequent fliers program for media uproar, our former POTUS is accumulating points faster than a hyperactive toddler collects Pez dispensers.
- The Art of the Deal or the Art of the Meal?
- Who knows if any deals were made, but one thing’s for sure: the art of the meal this time around left a bitter aftertaste that’s lingering longer than grandma’s overcooked brussels sprouts.
The Counter
- Oopsy-Daisy, Who’s That at My Table?
- It’s a simple mix-up, really. Who among us hasn’t accidentally invited a notorious figure to break bread? Like, “Oops, how did Genghis Khan get in here?”
- The Great Uniter, Dividing As Always
- In a beautiful display of unity, everyone can now agree on one thing: that dinner was a recipe for disaster. So in a way, didn’t he just bring us all together?
- The Rehabilitation Tour
- Look on the bright side; maybe it was a covert effort to rehabilitate ill-reputed folks with… exposure therapy? Yeah, let’s go with that.
- Feeding the Trolls, Literally
- Do trolls eat anything other than the happiness and sanity of internet users? Apparently, yes. They also enjoy fancy dinners and an entrée of infamy.
- A Toast to Free Speech
- At the end of the day, let’s raise our glasses to freedom of association, because nothing says liberty like the freedom to make absolutely face-palm-worthy decisions.
The Hot Take
In the incendiary inferno that is our political landscape, where diplomacy is as subtle as a brick through the window, we find ourselves asking, “How do we douse the flames?” Well, dear readers, as your liberal comedic cook, I suggest changing the menu. Let’s cultivate discernment as a starter, serve up some accountability as the main course, and for dessert?
A heaping helping of common sense, which, unfortunately, seems to be more of a delicacy these days. It’s time to wash it all down with a refreshing glass of ‘think before you book,’ because if we’re going to host dinner parties that echo through the annals of history, let’s at least set a table that wouldn’t make our forefathers choke on their powdered wigs.
Source: Fox News Stars Flip Out When Reminded That Trump ‘Had Dinner With Nazis’
