Trump again demanded prosecutions of six Democratic lawmakers Thursday while Attorney General Todd Blanche said there were no ongoing criminal investigations into lawmakers’ words. The justice system has become a vending machine that keeps returning the president’s dollar.

The lawmakers’ video urged military and intelligence personnel not to obey unlawful orders. The administration sought indictments earlier this year; a Washington federal grand jury unanimously rejected the charges. That was a grand-jury refusal, not an acquittal after a trial.

Blanche also said criticism can become a threat and then become criminal, but that point had not been reached. Free speech remains available, subject to an astonishing amount of announcing that free speech remains available.

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Political satire for your morning inbox.

Imagine standing in front of a vending machine, selecting a felony, and getting your money back. You feed it a printout of your election victory. It returns that too. Now there is a queue behind you and you are explaining why button B7 owes you a bag of handcuffs.

The denial was narrow. It did not erase a separate Texas federal prosecutor’s letter suggesting a civil-rights inquiry into Senator Richard Blumenthal’s investigation of White House ballroom donors. Blanche praised that prosecutor and said DOJ leadership was working with U.S. attorneys on ongoing investigations.

So this is not a blanket all-clear. It is the attorney general specifying which buttons currently do not produce a prosecution while the president remains at the machine.

Please insert evidence. This machine does not accept grievances.