Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
In an unsurprising revelation to those who’ve managed to feel shock in the political arena longer than they’ve owned a functioning TV, it turns out that presidents and political leaders have been partaking in affairs with a variety of figures, from actresses and spies to porn stars.
Yes, welcome to the shocking world where power is apparently an aphrodisiac, and morality is often as sturdy as a house of cards in a wind tunnel. The Daily Beast takes us on a salacious historical safari, revealing human frailties and the ‘little head’ making big, often internationally influential, decisions. Let’s dive in, shall we?
The Breakdown
- Bullet the Blue Sky: Presidents and their Hollywood Hobbies
- Yawn. Another day, another dollar, and yet another leader with a bouquet of star-struck mistresses. From liaisons in La-La Land to debacles in D.C., our leaders seemed to show no partiality—except, of course, for a particular proclivity for ‘actresses’ of all stages and screens. It’s not so much “Hail to the Chief” as it is “Hail to the Sleaze,” am I right?
- Yawn. Another day, another dollar, and yet another leader with a bouquet of star-struck mistresses. From liaisons in La-La Land to debacles in D.C., our leaders seemed to show no partiality—except, of course, for a particular proclivity for ‘actresses’ of all stages and screens. It’s not so much “Hail to the Chief” as it is “Hail to the Sleaze,” am I right?
- Under Covers Operations: International Affairs of Another Kind
- Espionage and sexy spy trysts sound like the backdrop of a James Bond movie, but why restrict it to fiction? Presidents and politicians have turned the White House into the Playboy Mansion, using pillow talk for data exchange. It’s double the pleasure, double the fun, and double the national security risk.
- Espionage and sexy spy trysts sound like the backdrop of a James Bond movie, but why restrict it to fiction? Presidents and politicians have turned the White House into the Playboy Mansion, using pillow talk for data exchange. It’s double the pleasure, double the fun, and double the national security risk.
- The Defining Role: When You Cast Your Presidency in Disaster
- Roles of a lifetime seem to extend beyond the silver screen into the actual Oval Office—that’s if we’re marking “lifetime” with a scandalous asterisk. Career-defining? Yes. Worthy of an Oscar? Depends on how well they managed to convince the populace they were just rehearsing for a part in “Commander in Briefs.”
- Roles of a lifetime seem to extend beyond the silver screen into the actual Oval Office—that’s if we’re marking “lifetime” with a scandalous asterisk. Career-defining? Yes. Worthy of an Oscar? Depends on how well they managed to convince the populace they were just rehearsing for a part in “Commander in Briefs.”
- Presidential Proclivities: A Spectrum of Spectrum
- So we’ve got a spectrum, a rainbow coalition of mistresses. From silver screen legends to adult entertainment visionaries, it seems every age, race, and career path is represented. Diversity is important, folks—even when choosing your next scandal partner.
- So we’ve got a spectrum, a rainbow coalition of mistresses. From silver screen legends to adult entertainment visionaries, it seems every age, race, and career path is represented. Diversity is important, folks—even when choosing your next scandal partner.
- Commander in Leaks: When Secrecy Takes a Backseat to Libido
- The greatest threat to national security: a leader’s unguarded libido. Who needs WikiLeaks when you’ve got lackeys leaking love stories left and right? Evidently, it’s much harder to secure pants than it is a country.
- The greatest threat to national security: a leader’s unguarded libido. Who needs WikiLeaks when you’ve got lackeys leaking love stories left and right? Evidently, it’s much harder to secure pants than it is a country.
The Counter
- Just Friends with Diplomatic Benefits
- Surely, there’s a logical explanation for all these dalliances. Perhaps these ‘friendships’ we’re so critical of were really just strategic moves on the geopolitical chessboard. After all, who needs ambassadors when you’ve got mistresses?
- Surely, there’s a logical explanation for all these dalliances. Perhaps these ‘friendships’ we’re so critical of were really just strategic moves on the geopolitical chessboard. After all, who needs ambassadors when you’ve got mistresses?
- National Security or Cockpit Security?
- I mean, can we really blame them for not following procedure, when the procedure itself is so inherently flawed? National security might’ve been compromised, but hey, securing ‘the cockpit’ seemed far more pressing at the time.
- I mean, can we really blame them for not following procedure, when the procedure itself is so inherently flawed? National security might’ve been compromised, but hey, securing ‘the cockpit’ seemed far more pressing at the time.
- The Moral of the Morals: It’s All Relative
- Morality is such a fickle fiend. Today’s absolute no-no is tomorrow’s “eh, maybe?” After all, who’s to say what’s right and what’s kinky? As long as we’re exporting democracy and not indecency, we’re golden, right?
- Morality is such a fickle fiend. Today’s absolute no-no is tomorrow’s “eh, maybe?” After all, who’s to say what’s right and what’s kinky? As long as we’re exporting democracy and not indecency, we’re golden, right?
- Consenting Constituents: The People’s Choice Awards
- They were elected by the people, for the people, and sometimes, apparently, with the people. Consent is key, and it seems there was plenty of bipartisan… cooperation. It’s a hands-on approach to governance!
- They were elected by the people, for the people, and sometimes, apparently, with the people. Consent is key, and it seems there was plenty of bipartisan… cooperation. It’s a hands-on approach to governance!
- Patriotic Pants: Wearing the Colors with Disdain
- Ah yes, the ol’ red, white, and bluish behavior. Spreading democracy across the sheets—I mean, streets—takes immense personal sacrifice. Even if that means sacrificing your dignity on the altar of love, or, in this case, lust.
- Ah yes, the ol’ red, white, and bluish behavior. Spreading democracy across the sheets—I mean, streets—takes immense personal sacrifice. Even if that means sacrificing your dignity on the altar of love, or, in this case, lust.
The Hot Take
So, in a world where infidelity is as common as a filibuster on the Senate floor, what’s a public to do? Well, for starters, we could stop treating our leaders like infallible demigods immune to earthly desires. Transparency seems to be the key here, and I’m not talking about lingerie. I mean, of course, the political kind.
Perhaps if we took the time to humanize politics instead of idolizing the political figures – understanding that they, much like us, are walking messes of contradictions – we could begin to address the issue of hypocrisy and expectation. Also, here’s a thought: maybe stop voting for lotharios who see the Oval Office as a dating pool? Just a suggestion. Keep it in your pants, Presidents; we’ve got a country to run.
Source: From Spies to Actresses to Porn Stars: All the Presidents’ Mistresses
