Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
In an unbelievable stroke of what I can only assume is sheer coincidence or maybe a desperate plea for attention, New England is waving goodbye to the last remnants of its coal industry. The region that’s better known for its clam chowder and autumn foliage is now taking on the persona of a green warrior.
It’s as if they realized, all of a sudden, that inhaling coal dust isn’t as fun as the industrial revolution made it look. According to The Hill, the coal plants are shutting down, and renewables are stepping up to the plate. Let’s just hope they don’t drop the ball and send us all back to the dark ages, shall we?
The Breakdown
- Out with the Old, In with the…Wind?
- The last coal plants are about as relevant as a Blockbuster membership card. The article highlights that these relics of the industrial past are finally being traded for renewable solutions. A moment of silence for the beloved coal, please.
- The last coal plants are about as relevant as a Blockbuster membership card. The article highlights that these relics of the industrial past are finally being traded for renewable solutions. A moment of silence for the beloved coal, please.
- Coal’s Retirement Party
- Coal is throwing in the towel and looking for beachfront property in Florida. The party’s over, and apparently, it’s renewables’ turn to hit the dance floor. Better late than never, right? At least now we can all breathe a little easier, minus the greenhouse gases.
- Coal is throwing in the towel and looking for beachfront property in Florida. The party’s over, and apparently, it’s renewables’ turn to hit the dance floor. Better late than never, right? At least now we can all breathe a little easier, minus the greenhouse gases.
- Renewables: The New Kids On the Block
- Solar panels and wind turbines aren’t just for hippies anymore. These new kids are stealing the spotlight, transforming how we think about powering our Instapots and electric cars. Coal is now that washed-up celebrity wondering where it all went wrong.
- Solar panels and wind turbines aren’t just for hippies anymore. These new kids are stealing the spotlight, transforming how we think about powering our Instapots and electric cars. Coal is now that washed-up celebrity wondering where it all went wrong.
- A Breath of Fresh Air?
- It’s like New England finally decided to take off the pollution-filtered goggles and take a gander at the real world. The shut down of coal plants symbolizes the region’s attempt at a lung detox. Let’s watch them trade their soot-covered overalls for something a bit more…organic.
- It’s like New England finally decided to take off the pollution-filtered goggles and take a gander at the real world. The shut down of coal plants symbolizes the region’s attempt at a lung detox. Let’s watch them trade their soot-covered overalls for something a bit more…organic.
- Who Needs Jobs Anyway?
- The article dissects the inevitable job loss with the close of coal plants. But who’s counting? We’ll just distract those unemployed workers with the shiny prospect of wind farms and job retraining. Because that’s worked so well in the past, hasn’t it?
- The article dissects the inevitable job loss with the close of coal plants. But who’s counting? We’ll just distract those unemployed workers with the shiny prospect of wind farms and job retraining. Because that’s worked so well in the past, hasn’t it?
The Counter
- Coal, An Unkindled Romance
- Let’s not kid ourselves. There are those who would rekindle the flame with coal faster than a teenager’s first love. They’ll be mourning the loss of their “good old days” when pollution was just part of the job description.
- Let’s not kid ourselves. There are those who would rekindle the flame with coal faster than a teenager’s first love. They’ll be mourning the loss of their “good old days” when pollution was just part of the job description.
- Green Jobs or Fantasy?
- I’m sure those green jobs are just around the corner, right? Any moment now, ex-coal miners will frolic in fields of solar panels. And I’m the Queen of England.
- I’m sure those green jobs are just around the corner, right? Any moment now, ex-coal miners will frolic in fields of solar panels. And I’m the Queen of England.
- Nostalgia Isn’t What It Used to Be
- Remember the days when you could look out your window and see that beautiful, thick smog? Me neither. New England seems to be having trouble letting go of their rose-tinted gas masks.
- Remember the days when you could look out your window and see that beautiful, thick smog? Me neither. New England seems to be having trouble letting go of their rose-tinted gas masks.
- Renewables: The Eternal Understudy
- Even with coal out of the picture, there’s always a shadow of doubt. Can renewables really carry the show or will they be second best, forever standing in the wings?
- Even with coal out of the picture, there’s always a shadow of doubt. Can renewables really carry the show or will they be second best, forever standing in the wings?
- The Unbearable Lightness of Breathing
- Is clean air all it’s cracked up to be? With the last coal plants closing and renewables stepping up, I’m sure someone out there is plotting a great bottled polluted air business venture.
- Is clean air all it’s cracked up to be? With the last coal plants closing and renewables stepping up, I’m sure someone out there is plotting a great bottled polluted air business venture.
The Hot Take
If I’m being perfectly honest, which I always am to a fault, New England’s step away from coal and into the arms of renewable energy is like my uncle trying to understand TikTok – bewildering but somewhat heartening. The solution here isn’t just swapping out energy sources like a bad pantomime. No, it’s about a roster of hilariously straightforward steps: invest in education so that the term ‘renewable’ isn’t just fancy talk, ensure infrastructure doesn’t break down like my last diet attempt, and remember it’s a marathon, not a sprint, unless you’re running from a coal ash spill, then sprint.
We need to support the workers transitioning from the coal industry because tossing folks onto the street without a backup plan is like serving soup with a fork – ineffective and downright messy. And let’s not forget to actually commit to the environmental policies instead of treating them like new year’s resolutions that are forgotten by February. The liberal approach isn’t just about ‘going green’, it’s about making sure no one is left behind, even if they’re covered in coal dust or not entirely convinced about the merits of kale.
Source: Last coal plants in New England to close; renewables take their place
