Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
So, apparently Governor Kristi Noem of South Dakota has reached new heights—or should I say, depths—in her quest to be politically incorrect. Move over, sensible policies, because shooting a raccoon that supposedly threatened her daughter’s dog, then bragging about it, is the new frontier. Seriously, this reads like a rejected script from Looney Tunes.
If you’re starting to wonder whether any raccoons were harmed in the making of Noem’s latest political stunt—well, yes. Yes, they were. And the internet had a day, catapulting the governor to viral fame under not-so-adorable circumstances.
The Breakdown
- Shooting Stars and Stripes
- Picture this: a high-profile politician turns a personal pest control incident into patriotic propaganda. Yes, folks, Governor Noem didn’t just defend family and fauna; she symbolically stood up against the “big city liberals” and their pesky animal rights. Because nothing says freedom like rallying your base with a bit of good old-fashioned wildlife warfare.
- Picture this: a high-profile politician turns a personal pest control incident into patriotic propaganda. Yes, folks, Governor Noem didn’t just defend family and fauna; she symbolically stood up against the “big city liberals” and their pesky animal rights. Because nothing says freedom like rallying your base with a bit of good old-fashioned wildlife warfare.
- Tailored for Twitter
- This wasn’t your garden-variety personal post. No, it had all the trimmings of a planned political maneuver, carefully curated to leave chaos in its wake. With one cheeky tweet, Noem managed to turn critter control into a crusade against over-sensitive snowflakes. The internet’s reaction? Predictably polarized—as intended.
- This wasn’t your garden-variety personal post. No, it had all the trimmings of a planned political maneuver, carefully curated to leave chaos in its wake. With one cheeky tweet, Noem managed to turn critter control into a crusade against over-sensitive snowflakes. The internet’s reaction? Predictably polarized—as intended.
- Media Melee
- The media had a field day, or more accurately, a field week. From eyebrow-raising editorials to outright condemnations, everyone had something to say about Noem’s rabid raccoon rendezvous. And while the liberal outlets recoiled in horror, the conservative commentators crowned her a heroine of rural resilience.
- The media had a field day, or more accurately, a field week. From eyebrow-raising editorials to outright condemnations, everyone had something to say about Noem’s rabid raccoon rendezvous. And while the liberal outlets recoiled in horror, the conservative commentators crowned her a heroine of rural resilience.
- Raccoon as Rhetoric
- Beyond the bizarre, there’s a metaphor masterclass here. The raccoon, in Noem’s narrative, becomes more than just a pest—it’s a stand-in for everything “real Americans” need to “defend” themselves against. Forget Russian bears or Chinese dragons; the real enemy is the North American raccoon.
- Beyond the bizarre, there’s a metaphor masterclass here. The raccoon, in Noem’s narrative, becomes more than just a pest—it’s a stand-in for everything “real Americans” need to “defend” themselves against. Forget Russian bears or Chinese dragons; the real enemy is the North American raccoon.
- Shot Heard ‘Round the Internet
- As with any viral political act, the echo chamber was deafening. Supporters praised her unwavering resolve and rugged individualism while detractors decried the incident as an over-the-top act of crass cruelty. All in all, a neatly packaged lesson in how to make headlines and inflame hearts with just one shot.
- As with any viral political act, the echo chamber was deafening. Supporters praised her unwavering resolve and rugged individualism while detractors decried the incident as an over-the-top act of crass cruelty. All in all, a neatly packaged lesson in how to make headlines and inflame hearts with just one shot.
The Counter
- Counter Point 1: What if it Was Just a Cat?
- Imagine the headlines if Noem had shot someone’s cat in her backyard. Are we picking which animals are okay to use for political bait? Just a thought, but perhaps consistency in our moral outrage could be something to aim for.
- Imagine the headlines if Noem had shot someone’s cat in her backyard. Are we picking which animals are okay to use for political bait? Just a thought, but perhaps consistency in our moral outrage could be something to aim for.
- Pest Control or Political Play?
- We’re really supposed to believe this was all about a raccoon? Or was it a carefully calculated stunt to snag the spotlight in a slow news cycle? If you ask me, the raccoon might just be the only innocent party here.
- We’re really supposed to believe this was all about a raccoon? Or was it a carefully calculated stunt to snag the spotlight in a slow news cycle? If you ask me, the raccoon might just be the only innocent party here.
- That Escalated Quickly
- From unknown raccoon to national news—did we need to come to this? Maybe a more humane approach could’ve been handled, one that wouldn’t lead to potential memes of Noem as Davy Crockett.
- From unknown raccoon to national news—did we need to come to this? Maybe a more humane approach could’ve been handled, one that wouldn’t lead to potential memes of Noem as Davy Crockett.
- The Real Pests
- Perhaps the real pests aren’t the raccoons but the politicians who exploit these scenarios for personal gain. Wouldn’t it be nice to tackle real issues, like healthcare or education, with the same fervor we summon for backyard beasties?
- Perhaps the real pests aren’t the raccoons but the politicians who exploit these scenarios for personal gain. Wouldn’t it be nice to tackle real issues, like healthcare or education, with the same fervor we summon for backyard beasties?
- The Ripple Effect
- This incident isn’t just about a raccoon; it’s about reinforcing divisive tactics in politics. Maybe we ought to think about the long-term effects of such stunts on the political environment and societal standards. Just a wild thought.
- This incident isn’t just about a raccoon; it’s about reinforcing divisive tactics in politics. Maybe we ought to think about the long-term effects of such stunts on the political environment and societal standards. Just a wild thought.
The Hot Take
In the grand tradition of political satire, let’s skewer the absurdity with a flame of common sense. It’s high time we replaced rifle rounds with rational thought. Perhaps the only way to deal with political stunts like these is to laugh them off the stage, all while voting for people who address real issues.
So, throw away your rabid raccoon hats, folks, and let’s arm ourselves with something far more dangerous in politics: informed opinions and a sense of decency. And when Election Day rolls around, remember the raccoon, and let’s vote for human rights as passionately as some defend their right to bear arms at pests.
Source: Noem Tries to Get ‘Politically Incorrect’ Cred From Killing a Dog
