Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
Source: Washington Post paperback bestsellers
The Details
Folks, gather round because we’re diving into the wild, page-turning universe where ‘paperback bestsellers’ is apparently still a thing. In an era where people’s attention spans are challenged by TikTok videos, there exists a mystical list curated by the bigwigs at the Washington Post that details which tree carcasses are flying off the shelves this week.
Now, let’s take a magical journey through the land of print, where words still mean something and you can physically flip a page instead of swiping on a screen. Mind-blowing, I know.
The Breakdown
- Apparently, Trees Are Still Fair Game
- The Self-Help Section is Laughing at Us
- No surprise here, the self-help gurus are dominating the charts. Because nothing screams ‘I have my life together’ like reading a book about how to have your life together. The irony is thicker than that book you claim you’ve read but actually use as a doorstop.
- No surprise here, the self-help gurus are dominating the charts. Because nothing screams ‘I have my life together’ like reading a book about how to have your life together. The irony is thicker than that book you claim you’ve read but actually use as a doorstop.
- Fiction Reflects Fact, Or Is It Vice Versa?
- And then we have fiction, where the characters have more depth than most politicians. If only our leaders were as complex as the plot twists in these novels. Perhaps then they could find their way out of a paper bag.
- And then we have fiction, where the characters have more depth than most politicians. If only our leaders were as complex as the plot twists in these novels. Perhaps then they could find their way out of a paper bag.
- Non-Fiction, Or the ‘Reality is Scarier than Fiction’ Section
- Wander into non-fiction and you’re slapped with the realization that truth is stranger – and sometimes more terrifying – than fiction. Who needs horror movies when you’ve got history books?
- Wander into non-fiction and you’re slapped with the realization that truth is stranger – and sometimes more terrifying – than fiction. Who needs horror movies when you’ve got history books?
- Cookbooks, Because Capitalism Tastes Better in Paperback
- Finally, let’s bow down to the culinary overlords who manage to make cookbooks bestsellers. Because nothing says ‘revolutionary’ like spending $30 on a book to learn what to do with an avocado beyond smearing it on toast.
The Counter
- Save the Digital Trees, Go Paper!
- Why worry about the sustainability of e-readers when you can hold a paperback that once oxygenated the earth? E-reader batteries die, but our love for paperbacks just gets recycled.
- Why worry about the sustainability of e-readers when you can hold a paperback that once oxygenated the earth? E-reader batteries die, but our love for paperbacks just gets recycled.
- Who Needs Help When You Can Self-Criticize?
- Self-help books might be a Trojan horse of capitalism, selling you remedies for invented problems. But without them, how would your coffee table provoke thoughtful conversations?
- Self-help books might be a Trojan horse of capitalism, selling you remedies for invented problems. But without them, how would your coffee table provoke thoughtful conversations?
- Character Building is Overrated
- Politicians may lack character development compared to our fictional heroes, but isn’t that why we have elections? To renew our subscription to the situational comedy that is politics?
- Politicians may lack character development compared to our fictional heroes, but isn’t that why we have elections? To renew our subscription to the situational comedy that is politics?
- Because Understanding is Overwhelming
- Non-fiction is the broccoli of the literary world – good for you, but oh, so hard to swallow. Who wouldn’t prefer sweet, sweet ignorance instead?
- Non-fiction is the broccoli of the literary world – good for you, but oh, so hard to swallow. Who wouldn’t prefer sweet, sweet ignorance instead?
- Let Them Eat Cake (Or Just Look at Pictures of It)
- Cookbooks may be the epitome of capitalist consumption, but drooling over high-def photos of food is a must. Plus, think of all the aspirational dinner parties you can plan and never have.
The Hot Take
Look, if we want to save this planet and our brains, we’ve got to get real. Reading is fundamental, but so is not being engulfed by rising sea levels. Maybe we should create waterproof books, so we can keep reading while treading water from the comfort of our living rooms.
And while we’re revolutionizing reading habits, let’s recycle our politicians like we do our books. Both tend to be outdated, and a refresh could do wonders. So here’s a thought: next time you want to pick up a bestseller, plant a tree first. That way, we’re at least breaking even. And maybe, just maybe, gift a self-help book to a politician – Lord knows they need it.
